#a kidney stone

[lvnce-mcclain]

.

[facts-i-just-made-up]

[gallusrostromegalus]

Lived through my emergency mouth surgery!

Lightly terrorized the medical staff by cheerfully telling them ketamine is a drug you can literally physically outrun before surgery, then getting up and walking to the front room unassisted way before I should have afterwards.

[theonnor]

New fuckers have dropped

I will now dissappear for another half a year goodbye

[noisyghost]

woof

(reposting with the full set; i think ark is very good about not ruining his clothes on full moons but, as they say, shit happens.)

[plum-pudding-everywhere]

komaeda in a shirt i saw on pinterest

[seo-changbinnies]

my favorite binnie looks (264/∞)

[sciderman]

what a weekend

[neonghozt]

Christian brutal snipez again

[catgirlweed]

idk

[abstract-hellbender]

what if hey were cowboys,,, all im saying...

[so-very-small]

i know mouth to mouth isn’t used in CPR anymore, but regardless i am thinking of being a tiny, already scared because you’re undergoing some medical emergency, now having a finger as big as you are giving you chest compressions, massive lips breathing air into your lungs. being utterly reliant on those two terrifying things and the giant who’s doing them, along with hoping the giant just enough pressure and air, and not too much.

[facts-i-just-made-up]

Time for the rematch. Surgeon vs. Kidney Stone. Please wish me (and the doctor) luck.

[xx-thedarklord-xx]

I got a raise today 😊

[jahanmp4]

q!Phil, about q!Fit's biceps : "Look at those veins"

q!Fit : "It might look impressive but I'm just severely dehydrated"

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

fic prompt: Ed & Stede watch a bird raise hatchlings through their bedroom window (I hope you're feeling better soon!)

"Stede, Stede, babe, holy shit, c'mere!"

Stede held out the teacup he'd brought for Ed, taking a sip from his own as he joined him at the window. "What's - oh, wow!"

"Yeah." Ed took a sniff of his teacup to get a whiff of the cinnamon Stede added at this time of year before taking a drink. The baby birds in the tree by their upstairs bedroom window were some kind of swallow, Stede thought, and looked to be pretty fresh. "Look at them - all cute and naked and everything."

"Just like you were last night," Stede said, nudging an elbow playfully into Ed's side.

"Heh." Ed leaned against him, his smile growing fond. "Pretty cool, right?"

"Pretty cool."

The birds were nice to check in on as they went throughout their days, Stede thought. They watched as they started to get feathers, as their eyes opened, as they started to look more like birds and less like gross little raw meat cutlets. Ed liked when they could spot the birds' mama, and always called for Stede to come watch so he could see her feed the babies and hop around, too.

That was why it was a bit unusual when Stede returned to their bedroom with a stack of folded laundry to see Ed quietly sitting on the bed, watching by himself.

"Alright, sweet pea?" Stede put a hand on Ed's shoulder, depositing the laundry on the bed to be put away later.

"Mhm." Ed leaned his temple against Stede's hip, and when Stede followed his eyes outside, he was a bit surprised to see two adult birds hopping around the nest. "They've got a dad. Didn't know bird dads were, like, very good."

"Ah." Stede clicked his tongue. "Well, maybe bird dads are shit, we don't know -"

"Nah, man, he's an excellent dad!" Ed's lip wobbled, just slightly, as he looked up at him. "Did you know birds got to have that? A dad who - who loves them, and feeds them, and teaches them how to flap their little wings around?"

"Well..." Stede sat next to him on the bed, pulling him into his side. "Sometimes, some birds get excellent dads, and some birds get awful dads. And it's not the birds' fault which one they get."

"Maybe it is," Ed said bitterly, his eyes shining. "Maybe if they were just better at doing their little bird chores and had better bird personalities, their bird dads would like them more."

"Oh, honey, you know that's not true." Stede leaned their foreheads together, looking out at the soft blue sky outside and the birds in the tree. "Baby birds don't have anything to apologize for. They're just babies. They've never done anything wrong."

Ed was quiet, for a long moment, and when he spoke his voice was very small. "It's not fair."

"No," Stede agreed, thinking back to cruel words spoken in a low, unkind register, thinking back to feeling small and somehow wrong for it. "It's not fair at all."

They were both a bit sad when they went upstairs for bed one night and the birds were gone. They'd known it had been coming, they'd watched them flapping their little wings and venturing onto the branches, but it was still a bit sad.

"I hope they'll be okay," Ed said, looking out the window as he got changed into his pajamas. "It's a hard world to be a little baby bird in. I hope..."

He trailed off, his head tucking in the way he did when he thought he was being silly in a way Stede wouldn't like, which just wouldn't do.

"I hope," Stede said brightly, "that they make friends, and maybe even lovers...do birds have lovers? I hope they find out, I guess."

"And I hope they have a good life."

"The best," Stede agreed, joining Ed at the window, wrapping an arm around his waist. "And I hope they always have somewhere to go. Where they feel safe. And loved."

Ed brought Stede's hand up to his lips, kissing his palm. "I hope so, too."